


Ostracize

by notjustmom



Series: Words, Words, Words [60]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Johnlock Fluff, M/M, more Christmas it is December after all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 16:48:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5424512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notjustmom/pseuds/notjustmom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ostracize: verb: ˈästrəˌsīz: exclude (someone) from a society or group.</p><p>mid 17th century: from Greek ostrakizein, from ostrakon ‘shell or potsherd’ (on which names were written, in voting to banish unpopular citizens).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ostracize

The ghosts were were loud tonight, not of the recent past, but the faint, childhood echoes. The boys who would ostracize him, no matter how hard he tried, were back in his head..."Sherlock, what a stupid name...parents hate you, huh?"

He had kissed John softly and left the security of their bed, not wanting to wake him up with such nonsense. He wasn't sure why their voices were so strong, perhaps it was because it was close to Christmas, when all the boys went home, while he alone stayed at school, parents off on their travels, Mycroft too busy and important to invite him to stay in London...

He poured himself a rare stiff drink and sat down in front of their Christmas tree. At first, he had rolled his eyes as John dragged him all over town in search of the 'perfect' one, then they had to buy new lights and ornaments. John had taught him the proper technique for decorating, once they managed to push the monstrosity up the seventeen steps and finally had it standing upright. He had to admit it was beautiful, though the joy that glowed from John's face as Sherlock placed the skull on top was more than his heart could take. He had climbed down from the mantle and snogged his blogger breathless before he felt his heart rate get anywhere close to normal.

"What was that for, love?" John asked, once he could speak again.

"Just because." Sherlock had not understood enough to be able to explain why it meant so much at that moment; now he knew. In spite of everything, somehow, he was no longer alone, no longer lonely. He was loved in a way that made him dizzy at times, and he discovered, much to his surprise that he was capable of returning John's love, kiss for kiss, sigh for sigh...

"Nightmare?" John was standing in the doorway, nodding at the empty glass in his hand.

"Just thinking..."

"About?"

"You."

"And?" John walked in the room and sat behind him, wrapping his arms and legs around him.

Sherlock put the tumbler down and leaned back into the strong embrace. "...and I've come to the undeniable conclusion that I am a very lucky sod."

John laughed as he buried his nose into Sherlock's curls, and they sat quietly for what seemed an eternity, just enfolded in each other.

Sherlock turned in John's arms, and looked him in the eyes. "You will never truly know how grateful I am that you are here with me. I never believed-"

"Love-"

"No, I need to tell you, please?"

John nodded.

"I never believed anyone could choose to love me, as I am, yet, you-you managed to find something in me that made you believe I was worth loving-please, I need to get this out-you must have thought I was capable of returning your love, in spite of what everyone else thinks of me. You chose me when others found I was lacking, and gave me a gift of your patience, trust and a ridiculous amount of faith-"

John wiped away Sherlock's tears and gently kissed him.

"I am so sorry, love, that anyone ever made you feel less than the remarkable, beautiful, human being that you are. I am the fortunate one. There are moments when I just sit and close my eyes, listening to you ramble about a case, or play your violin, even when you screech at the telly, and I know how amazing it is that you took a chance on me. You could see through all my anger and fears and you carefully pulled down my walls. No one else had the guts to do that for me. You were the only one who could understand, I think."

"I love you."

"And I, you, but I'm getting too old to sit here like this, can you help me up?"

Sherlock laughed that laugh that existed for John's ears alone, and pulled him gently to his feet. "Back to bed, love?"

"Bed, please, yes."

Sherlock led his blogger back to their room, tucked John into bed and stood for a moment, watching sleep overtake him. He shook his head and grinned to himself, then disrobed and fell into bed, curling around his best friend and lover.

"Night, love."


End file.
